Who am I? This is the biggest question that I’ve asked God, and for the longest time I didn’t know the answer. I used to believe that I was a tool to be used by people. People around me would order me around and I would convince myself I wanted to help them. I think I did this for a sense of worth. I would take care of others and pay no attention to my own needs. It wasn’t until I truly gave my life to christ when I started to know who I was. Coming to realize who I am in Christ was not an instantaneous thing, but is a process that I am still going through today. When I gave my life to Jesus, I started to feel a sense of worth and not like what I felt before. This feeling that I had felt like nothing of this world. I felt like a completely different being, someone who was loved and had purpose. I found out that my life would be changed forever, but only if I allowed God to work within me. God was changing my heart for the better but that didn’t mean that it was easy. Changing the way I viewed myself was and is a difficult task. I can say that I view myself in a totally different way now than I ever have, but only by the grace of God. Although I definitely know who I am in christ sometimes my feelings don’t add up to the truth.
There are times where I do everything right and everything feels perfect and I know exactly who I am but the times where I mess up or make a mistake my self esteem goes down and I start to believe that the mistake is my Identity. My identity does not come from my mistakes. My identity comes from the word of God and the word of God says that I am His son, a coheir to Christ in His Kingdom and nothing can take that away. God loves me unconditionally and no matter how many times I mess up His love will never waiver and He will never change. Our God is a perfect God who is faithful and infinite.